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Monthly Archives: February 2014

Interesting fact: Abraham Lincoln is recognisable by his silhouette alone, a characteristic he shares with other cultural icons such as Mickey Mouse, Homer Simpson, Sonic The Hedgehog and Michael Jackson.

Hmm very worthy,  but surely this is boring? Well the opening section is dark, gloomy and heavy going without much reward. I stopped watching 2 films early before this (Step Up 4 : Miami Heat and The Incredible Burt Wonderstone) and this almost became the third. Stick with it though and things do get much more interesting and emotional as Lincoln struggles to gather support for the 13th Amendment (which abolishes slavery).

Is Daniel Day Lewis any good with an axe? Er.. You are thinking of Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter. It is true that the real Lincoln was very handy with an axe in his younger years. This film however is focused on a much later part of his life. He must balance the need to sign a peace agreement with the South (and end the bloody civil war) with his desire to end slavery – which if it happens could stop the South agreeing to peace terms – meaning thousands more dead. It’s a tough and tricky time for him, and there are no vampires!

So is this better film that Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter? You are obsessed with that film. Yes it’s better (2 points better) but that film was more digestible and enjoyable. Daniel Day Lewis is very good as Lincoln, managing to portray him in advanced age especially well. A lot of actors will end up looking like a young man wearing an ‘old man’ outfit. They miss the unsteadiness, and the slower movements of the eyes and body of an older person. A notable bad point about this film however is that Spielberg tries to be clever in the way he shows Abe’s death (it’s not a spoiler to say that Lincoln was shot while watching a play). It’s shown in an indirect way, which means you don’t see Abe being shot at all and as a result you don’t feel much when he dies – which is a shame.

Should I watch this then? It’s very long… There’s no reason why you should. You could easily learn more about Lincoln by reading a couple of pages in a book, and the image of him portrayed here is of a very righteous, clever, almost saintly man. It’s possible he really was like that, although it’s doubtful any man could be. Overall though it’s a good film. It’s just heavy going at times.

Give me the score!

6/10

Hmm, I think I might watch Star Trek Into Darkness instead. It has laser guns..

Okay….

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I never got to see this part of the film…

Things aren’t going well. This is the second film in a row I have stopped watching early. This time however I did manage to get 35 minutes into the film.

So why did I stop watching? Simply because I wasn’t enjoying it. The humour seemed too obvious and as a result not funny. Add to that an unlikeable main character (Burt Wonderstone played by Steve Carell) and a predictable story arc (I would guess the main character becomes more likeable). There seemed little point in continuing. I did like the jokes at the expense of magicians like David Blaine – the idea that these days people would rather watch a guy stand in a box for 30 days than watch a proper trick. But that’s all there was.

Jim Carrey’s in this film – it’s been a while since I’ve seen him in one. He plays a trendy new magician called Steve Gray  who wasn’t very funny either but he did at least have a good line : Burt Wonderstone wants to tell him about an idea for a show  and Carrey says :  “I’ll tell you what, pretend I’m still here and tell me all about it”, and then he drives off in his van. I’m now going to do something similar and pretend that I watched the rest of this film and it was exactly like the first 35 minutes. Fairly crap…

2/10

What the hell ??

This could be the Citizen Kane of street dance films. I will never know since I stopped watching after the first 10 minutes. The unimpressive sight of a bunch of twats dancing lamely on the tops of cars while another one of their number records it on camera put me off straight away. The fact that all this is meant to be ‘cool’ and somehow aspirational for today’s teenagers made me want to vomit violently.

I watched up to the point where the bland main male and female lead characters were introduced to each other. They then did some of the most embarrassing dancing ever. I decided to leave them to it.

A 1% chance that this is the best street dance film ever and a 99% chance that it’s shit.

1/10